Guest post by John Wasinski, M.Ed. John has been in education and youth development for ten years: three in his own classroom and three as a substitute teacher. John is currently developing workshops for all ages.
This last month has brought more and more information about bullying out into the open. There have been a lot of tragedies across the country. What a terrible month, but, a lot of good is coming out of it, and there’s change. This part is good.
I read a blog today that hit home about how bullying feels to a child. For some of us this might bring up some strong memories, as it did for the author, who is now a dad. It’s a long read, but worth it.
And after reading it, I’m realizing how important it is to follow through, every time I perceive something that could be bullying – not that I didn’t do that before, but until recently I haven’t thought about the big picture and sure didn’t think that I might possibly the only adult to notice something… or the only adult who really follows through.
As a sub that’s signed up in eight different districts, I have some favorite schools, and there’s also two or three I really dislike because I don’t like the culture there. But what I’m realizing is that most of the kids in those schools don’t like the negative culture, either. Those are cultures where adults are less aware about kids’ feelings and needs, and bullying thrives. And actually, by being there, and noticing what’s going on, I’m actually making a difference. There’s been two times in the last three years that a bullied kid has come to me to talk, during a sub assignment in one of those schools I dislike. Both times, although I don’t know if I did everything right and I don’t know how long it lasted, some positive change in the situation happened, but in both cases, the issue had been going on for some time, and I found out from the kids that I was the first to do anything about it.
It’s scary to think about what can happen if no one intervenes. I’ve read about communities that have had youth suicides. I know of two communities that had four in one year. I don’t like the thought of singling out any particular community by name, but, to understand what is happening to kids we sometimes have to know the details.
The question for me, in my position this year, is do we (as adults) go where we’re not happy and we’re not fully supported – in order to make a difference there? Or do we go where we feel best and we are supported and where we can work best – and encourage, enlighten, or put appropriate pressure on others, from our safe place? I guess as a sub I don’t have to answer that one too directly – because of financial pressure I usually have to take the best paying available position every day no matter if it’s in a more enjoyable school or not, and the best paying one happens to have a very good school climate. But, I land in the unpleasant ones too, just not as often.
Two other links to share – the first is from the Beatitudes Society, a Christian community online. If you know any young people facing bullying because of their sexual orientation, there are resources listed in the article that anyone can safely turn to. The link from CNN is about a Christian response to anti-gay bullying. As he says,”ideological differences don’t matter to a middle school child who is afraid to go to school.”
My Take – A Christian Response to Anti-Gay Bullying
I chose these two articles to share not because I expect that any percentage of people who read the blog are of the same faith as the authors, but more to show that the desire to help students be safe is something that can cross our religious ideologies, whatever they may be.
One link was left out from the Beatitudes Society post and it is informative: some very shocking statistics from the 2009 National School Climate Survey for GLBT Youth. For educators, GLSEN provides factual information on the prevalence of bullying, and strategies for reaching the goal of providing a safe school climate for all students. Their reports can be printed and shared.
2013 National School Climate Survey: Click here for up-to-date research
Part two of this blog installment will discuss some things you can do when you encounter a bullying situation in your school or classroom. It’s not expert advice, but it has worked for me, and by combining these ideas with your people skills and your professional training, you’ll find ways to help kids that work for you.