It’s very easy to become frustrated and discouraged when a student displays negative behaviors. At the time, it may feel good to vent the anger, but the teacher who makes a conscious effort to calm down before issuing discipline provides a wonderful learning experience for the student both in the scope of the discipline used and in the modeling behavior of the teacher.
Teachers who discipline emotionally tend to escalate situations by yelling, threatening, or by making unrealistic demands. This causes students to become less receptive to instructions, to react emotionally to even basic discipline, and to themselves approach interactions with others negatively. When substitute teachers pause to calm down and think about discipline in a more logical fashion, they often come up with more creative and more applicable methods that actually increase the student’s learning and decrease the likelihood of further incidents for the same behavior.
Using negative emotion while disciplining displays a lack of impulse control and an inability to be responsible in stressful situations. Certainly, these are not things teachers want to see in their students, and are therefore not things that should be displayed for them. Substitutes who take the time to calm down send one clear message to a student: be responsible. Be responsible for your own actions, for your interactions with others, and for the outcomes of your actions. The “Do as I say, not as I do” behavior reinforces to a student that standards and expectations are flexible and that rules do not apply to everyone. The teacher who uses a calmer approach models self-control, problem solving, interpersonal skills, and a sense of creativity and creative thinking, all things that a student will learn and respect.
How can you ensure that your discipline doesn’t contain negative emotion? First, be aware of your body language. Make & keep eye contact, a strong posture, and keep enough distance between yourself and the student to not seem threatening. Your facial expression should match the content of your message. Second, be aware of what your voice is portraying. Speak clearly and deliberately. Don’t be diverted by student denial or arguing. Listen to their explanations but stand your ground. You could try to say something like, “I will be happy to talk to you when you’re speaking as calmly as I am.” Lastly, consider what you are visualizing in your mind. Rather than using willpower to stay in a peaceful state, think of handling behavior issues with cold detachment. When a student breaks a rule, enforce it with the same matter-of-fact way a firefighter would. Firefighters are quiet and appear to walk casually when arriving on scene. This often surprises bystanders. They expect them to rush to the aid of the injured, yelling excitedly into walkie-talkies. However, what they’re doing is purposefully staying calm so they can think clearly and make correct decisions. If their adrenaline is pumping, they inevitably make costly mistakes.
Handling classroom management without getting worked-up and feeling angry is a great benefit for you and your students. What other strategies have you found that work for keeping your emotions in check while disciplining?